This week we celebrated my mother’s birthday. We had family, food and my mother definitely had fun. However I don’t think she needed any of that, simply having her grandchild in her arms was more than enough to have a good time.
I wanted to take this opportunity to truly thank my mum in what she’s done for me. After all if it wasn’t for her and her sacrifices I wouldn’t be the person I am today and I definitely wouldn’t be the mother that I am (still very much in the making).
For as long as I can remember my mother has always put family before anything else life. Every decision she has made has moulded my brother and I into the people we are today.
Thank you so much mama. I couldn’t have done anything in life if it wasn’t for your positive voice in my head making me feel I am invincible. All the confidence in the world couldn’t have pushed me to do the things I have but one word from you and I am a changed person.
As thankful as I am for everything my mother has done for me I had a new wave of gratitude after I gave birth to my baby girl.
In our culture as soon as the mother has given birth, both mother and baby go and stay with the mother’s parents for some much needed recovery and pampering and let’s face it no one apart from your own mother can give you that.
We did this slightly differently. My husband had two weeks of paternity leave so we asked my mother to come and stay with us for the first two weeks and after that I would go and stay with her.
My mother tirelessly would make me a fresh breakfast, lunch and dinner. And that was a separate meal to the rest of the family. So you can imagine the amount of cooking she did on a daily basis. The Indian post birth recovery remedies have to be followed strictly for it to impact and my mother took this very seriously, after all I am still her baby. And the diet is real, let me tell you!!
I should mention my husband and I live in a town house. So for my mother to be going up and down two flights of stairs several times a day was a big deal as she suffers from extreme joint pains. Of course I told her not to do this but somehow she pushed right through the pain to make sure I was properly taken care of. Just a glimpse of how selfless her love has always been.
Even at night when she could hear our baby girl crying she would come up to help settle her just so my husband and I could get a little more sleep (even though she would’ve been on her feet all day).
I honestly don’t know where my mother got the strength sometimes to do everything she did for me. After I moved to my parents place it wasn’t just me she was looking after, it was the rest of family too. Of course my father and brother helped so much with the new little human. My father was completely smitten, a side I have never seen before. Our morning ritual was a time we both looked forward to. I got to get a little more sleep and he got some quality time with bubs.
It was so nice to have them looking after, not just their grandchild but also me. After birth I was so happy to see friends and family and they would completely be in awe of this new little baby which of course melted my heart. But there was a part of me that suddenly felt side lined, no one knew what I had been through at labour to get my baby out. No one asked. No one knew how I felt at that time and through the weeks after. No one asked and if they did I really couldn’t bring myself to go into much detail, so for now “I’m fine” was the default answer. Only my mother and my husband who were there through it all knew exactly how gruelling those two days of labour truly were.
My mother knew what I had been through and she was adamant to be my strength to get me back to myself. Whilst everyone looked after my baby, she looked after hers.
Even when I was growing up, I considered her my best friend. Of course I had wonderful friends from school, etc but there was a bond between us that just encompassed all aspects of friendship and motherhood. I have always confided in her, there really wasn’t anything I couldn’t talk to her about. I can only pray I raise my baby girl to feel this comfortable with me.
Just saying thank you isn’t enough. It doesn’t describe the depth of my gratitude. I will strive everyday to be the best mother I can be and I know you will always be my positive energy keeping me strong when things get tough. I love you so much mama. My hero, my magic.
